Apples of Gold

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Challenge to Women

by John Piper

1. That all of your life—in whatever calling—be devoted to the glory of God.

2. That the promises of Christ be trusted so fully that peace and joy and strength fill your soul to overflowing.

3. That this fullness of God overflow in daily acts of love so that people might see your good deeds and give glory to your Father in heaven.

4. That you be women of the Book, who love and study and obey the Bible in every area of its teaching. That meditation on Biblical truth be the source of hope and faith. And that you continue to grow in understanding through all the chapters of your life, never thinking that study and growth are only for others.

5. That you be women of prayer, so that the Word of God would open to you; and the power of faith and holiness would descend upon you; and your spiritual influence would increase at home and at church and in the world.

6. That you be women who have a deep grasp of the sovereign grace of God undergirding all these spiritual processes, that you be deep thinkers about the doctrines of grace, and even deeper lovers and believers of these things.

7. That you be totally committed to ministry, whatever your specific role, that you not fritter your time away on soaps or ladies magazines or aimless hobbies, any more than men should fritter theirs away on excessive sports or aimless diddling in the garage. That you redeem the time for Christ and his Kingdom.

8. That, if you are single, you exploit your singleness to the full in devotion to Christ and not be paralyzed by the desire to be married.

9. That, if you are married, you creatively and intelligently and sincerely support the leadership of your husband as deeply as obedience to Christ will allow; that you encourage him in his God-appointed role as head; that you influence him spiritually primarily through your fearless tranquility and holiness and prayer.

10. That, if you have children, you accept responsibility with your husband (or alone if necessary) to raise up children who hope in the triumph of God, sharing with him the teaching and discipline of the children, and giving to the children that special nurturing touch and care that you are uniquely fitted to give.

11. That you not assume that secular employment is a greater challenge or a better use of your life than the countless opportunities of service and witness in the home the neighborhood, the community, the church, and the world. That you not only pose the question: Career vs. full time mom? But that you ask as seriously: Full time career vs. freedom for ministry? That you ask: Which would be greater for the Kingdom— to be in the employ of someone telling you what to do to make his business prosper, or to be God's free agent dreaming your own dream about how your time and your home and your creativity could make God's business prosper? And that in all this you make your choices not on the basis of secular trends or yuppie lifestyle expectations, but on the basis of what will strengthen the family and advance the cause of Christ.

12. That you step back and (with your husband, if you are married) plan the various forms of your life's ministry in chapters. Chapters are divided by various things—age, strength, singleness, marriage, employment choices, children at home, children in college, grandchildren, retirement, etc. No chapter has all the joys. Finite life is a series of tradeoffs. Finding God's will, and living for the glory of Christ to the full in every chapter is what makes it a success, not whether it reads like somebody else's chapter or whether it has in it what chapter five will have.

13. That you develop a wartime mentality and lifestyle; that you never forget that life is short, that billions of people hang in the balance of heaven and hell every day, that the love of money is spiritual suicide, that the goals of upward mobility (nicer clothes, cars, houses, vacations, food, hobbies) are a poor and dangerous substitute for the goals of living for Christ with all your might, and maximizing your joy in ministry to people's needs.

14. That in all your relationships with men you seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit in applying the Biblical vision of manhood and womanhood; that you develop a style and demeanor that does justice to the unique role God has given to man to feel responsible for gracious leadership in relation to women—a leadership which involves elements of protection and care and initiative. That you think creatively and with cultural sensitivity (just as he must do) in shaping the style and setting the tone of your interaction with men.

15. That you see Biblical guidelines for what is appropriate and inappropriate for men and women in relation to each other not as arbitrary constraints on freedom but as wise and gracious prescriptions for how to discover the true freedom of God's ideal of complementarity. That you not measure your potential by the few roles withheld but by the countless roles offered.

That you turn off the TV and Radio and think about...

The awesome significance of motherhood

Complementing a man's life as his wife

Ministries to the handicapped:
hearing impaired
blind
lame
retarded

Ministries to the sick:
nursing
physician
hospice care—cancer, AIDS, etc.
community health

Ministries to the socially estranged:
emotionally impaired
recovering alcoholics
recovering drug users
escaping prostitutes
abused children, women
runaways, problem children
orphans

Prison ministries:
women's prisons!
families of prisoners
rehabilitation to society

Ministries to youth:
teaching
sponsoring
open houses and recreation
outings and trips
counseling
academic assistance

Sports ministries:
neighborhood teams
church teams

Therapeutic counseling:
independent
church based
institutional

Audio visual ministries:
composition
design
production
distribution

Writing ministries:
free lance
curriculum development
fiction
non-fiction
editing
institutional communications
journalistic skills for publications

Teaching ministries:
Sunday school: children, youth, students, women
grade school
high school
college

Music ministries:
composition
training
performance
voice
choir
instrumentalist

Evangelistic ministries:
personal witnessing
Inter Varsity
Campus Crusade
Navigators
Home Bible Studies
outreach to children
Visitation teams
Counseling at meetings
Billy Graham phone bank

Radio and TV ministries:
technical assistance
writing
announcing
producing

Theater and drama ministries:
acting
directing
writing
scheduling

Social ministries:
literacy
pro-life
pro-decency
housing
safety
beautification

Pastoral care assistance:
visitation
newcomer welcoming and assistance
hospitality
food and clothing and transportation

Prayer ministries:
praying!!!
mobilizing for major Concerts of Prayer
helping with small groups of prayer
coordinating prayer chains
promoting prayer days and weeks and vigils

Missions:
all of the above across cultures

Support ministries:
countless jobs that undergird major ministries

Monday, October 15, 2007

Evidences of Pride

Pray for a teachable spirit. Prepare to examine your heart. And be ready to repent.

Evidences of Pride

"God resists the proud, But gives grace to the humble." James 4:6

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Mother's Elbows on My Bed

I was but a youth and thoughtless,
As all youths are apt to be;
Though I had a Christian mother
who had taught me carefully.

There came a time when pleasure
Of the world came to allure,
And I no more sought the guidance
Of her love so good and pure.

Her tender admonitions fell
But lightly on my ear,
And for the gentle warnings
I felt an inward sneer.

How could I prove my manhood
Were I not firm of will?
No threat of future evil
Should all my pleasure kill.

But mother would not yield her boy
To Satan's sinful sway,
And though I spurned her counsel
She knew a better way.

No more she tried to caution
Of ways she knew were vain,
And though I guessed her heartache
I could not know its pain.

She made my room an altar,
A place of secret prayer,
And there she took her burden
And left it in His care.

And morning, noon and evening
By that humble bedside low,
She sought the aid of Him who
Best can understand a mother's woe.

And I went my way unheeding,
Careless of the life I led,
Until one day I noticed
Prints of elbows on my bed.

Then I saw that she had been there
Praying for her wayward boy,
Who for love of worldly pleasure
Would her peace of mind destroy.

While I wrestled with my conscience,
Mother wrestled still in prayer,
Till that little room seemed hallowed
Because so oft she met Him there.

With her God she held the fortress,
And though not a word she said,
My stubborn heart was broken
By those imprints on my bed.

Long the conflict raged within me,
Sin against my mother's prayers.
Sin must yield-for Mother never
While she daily met Him there.

And her constant love and patience
Were like coals upon my head,
Together with the imprints
Of her elbows on my bed.

Mother-love and God-love
Are a combination rare,
And one that can't be beaten
When sealed by earnest prayer.

And so at last the fight was won,
And I to Christ was led,
And mother's prayers were answered
By her elbows on my bed.

~author unknown

From Moms In Touch International

Thursday, January 18, 2007

A Wartime Walkie Talkie

Prayer is the walkie talkie on the battlefield of the world. It calls on God for courage (Ephesians 6:19). It calls in for troop deployment and target location (Acts 13:1-3). It calls in for protection and air cover (Matthew 6:13; Luke 21:36). It calls in for fire power to blast open a way for the Word (Colossians 4:3). It calls in for the miracle of healing for the wounded soldiers (James 5:16). It calls in for supplies for the forces (Matthew 6:11; Philippians 4:6). And it calls in for needed reinforcements (Matthew 9:38).

This is the place of prayer--on the battlefield of the world. It is a wartime walkie talkie for spiritual warfare, not a domestic intercom to increase the comfort of the saints. And one of the reasons it malfunctions in the hands of so many Christian soldiers is that they have gone AWOL.

~ John Piper, The Pleasures of God

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Developing Personal Discipline

Insightful article on Developing Personal Discipline by Nancy Leigh DeMoss.

Examine Yourself

“Know well the condition of your flocks, and give attention to your herds." Proverbs 27:23

Every wise businessman will occasionally hold a stock-taking, when he will examine his accounts, consider what he has on hand, and determine clearly whether his trade is prosperous or declining. Every man who is wise in the kingdom of heaven will cry, "Search me, O God . . . Try me"; and he will frequently set apart special seasons for self-examination, to discover whether things are right between God and his soul. The God whom we worship is a great heart-searcher; and in the past His servants referred to Him as "I am he who searches mind and heart, and I will give to each of you as your works deserve." Let me encourage you in His name to diligently search and solemnly test your spiritual state, for fear you should come short of the promised rest. This is what every wise man does, and what God Himself does with us all.

I exhort you to do the same yourself this evening. Let the oldest saint examine the basics of his piety, for gray heads may cover evil hearts: And the young professor should not despise the word of warning, for the greenness of youth may accompany the rottenness of hypocrisy. Every now and then a spiritual giant falls. The enemy still continues to sow tares among the wheat. It is not my aim to introduce doubts and fears to your mind; I rather hope that the rough wind of self-examination may help to drive them away.

It is not security but fleshly security that we would kill, not confidence but carnal confidence that we would overthrow, not peace but false peace that we would destroy. By the precious blood of Christ, which was not shed to make you a hypocrite, but rather that sincere souls might declare His praise, I urge you to search and look, for fear that in the end it will be said of you, "Tekel, you have been weighed in the balances and found wanting."

References: Psalm 139:23; Revelation 2:23; Daniel 5:27

~Charles Spurgeon, Morning and Evening

Friday, December 22, 2006

Glorifying God

You may be very sure that if your sincere intent is to glorify God and bless others in your efforts, and you are not motivated by unloving attitudes, you will see the hand of God move with you as you expectantly do your work. Your part is simply to expect it, watch for it, give thanks as you see it, and, on the basis of our experience, encourage others to do the same.

~ Dallas Willard, The Great Omission

Monday, August 28, 2006

Apostrophe to Sarah Pierpont

by Jonathan Edwards [c. 1723]

They say there is a young lady in [New Haven] who is beloved of that almighty Being, who made and rules the world, and that there are certain seasons in which this great Being, in some way or other invisible, comes to her and fills her mind with exceeding sweet delight, and that she hardly cares for anything, except to meditate on him--that she expects after a while to be received up where he is, to be raised up out of the world and caught up into heaven; being assured that he loves her too well to let her remain at a distance from him always. There she is to dwell with him, and to be ravished with his love and delight forever. Therefore, if you present all the world before her, with the richest of its treasures, she disregards it and cares not for it, and is unmindful of any pain or affliction. She has a strange sweetness in her mind, and singular purity in her affections; is most just and conscientious in all her actions; and you could not persuade her to do anything wrong or sinful, if you would give her all the world, lest she should offend this great Being. She is of a wonderful sweetness, calmness and universal benevolence of mind; especially after those seasons in which this great God has manifested himself to her mind. She will sometimes go about from place to place, singing sweetly; and seems to be always full of joy and pleasure; and no one knows for what. She loves to be alone, and to wander in the fields and on the mountains, and seems to have someone invisible always conversing with her.

Saturday, March 18, 2006

The Will of God

The will of God will never take you
where the grace of God cannot keep you,
where the arms of God cannot support you,
where the riches of God cannot supply your needs,
where the power of God cannot endow you.

The will of God will never take you
where the Spirit of God cannot work through you,
where the wisdom of God cannot teach you,
where the army of God cannot protect you,
where the hands of God cannot mold you.

The will of God will never take you
where the love of God cannot enfold you,
where the mercies of God cannot sustain you,
where the peace of God cannot calm your heart,
where the authority of God cannot overrule for you.

The will of God will never take you
where the comfort of God cannot dry your tears,
where the Word of God cannot feed you,
where the miracles of God cannot be done for you,
where the Omnipresence of God cannot find you.

~author unknown

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Faith Lessons

"We were troubled on every side" (2 Corinthians 7:5).

Why should God have to lead us thus, and allow the pressure to be so hard and constant? Well, in the first place, it shows His all-sufficient strength and grace much better than if we were exempt from pressure and trial. "The treasure is in earthen vessels, thta the excellency of the power may be of God, and not of us."

It makes us more conscious of our dependence upon Him. God is constantly trying to teach us our dependence, and to hold us absolutely in His hand and hanging upon His care.

This was the place where Jesus Himself stood and where He wants us to stand, not with self-constituted strength, but with a hand ever leaning upon His, and a trust that dare not take one step alone. It teaches us trust.

There is no way of learning faith except by trial. It is God's school of faith, and it is far better for us to learn to trust God than to enjoy life.

The lesson of faith once learned, is an everlasting acquisition and an eternal fortune made; and without trust even riches will leave us poor.

~from Days of Heaven upon Earth, as quoted in Streams in the Desert.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

All Scripture is God Breathed

"Your relationship with Christ will never be any greater than your relationship with His Word."

~Nancy Leigh DeMoss

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God. And the Word became flesh and dwelt among us, and we beheld His glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father, full of grace and truth." John 1:1,14

"All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work." 2 Timothy 3:16-17

Friday, February 10, 2006

A Heavenly Valentine

"God is love" (1 John 4:8).

Some years ago, while browsing a musty antique shop, I came across a slightly faded, antique valentine. The writing was barely legible and made out to Miss Elsie. I didn't know who Miss Elsie was, but she must have treasured it to have saved it all these years. Romantic curiosity took hold of me, so I paid for it and brought it home.

I wondered about this valentine. Who sent it? Was it a friend? A secret admirer? Or perhaps her groom? Were the words meaningful to her? Did she read them over and over again, pondering and treasuring them in her heart? I also wondered, did the love survive the years? Was it a passing crush, a love that was never fulfilled or realized? Or was it an enduring love that spanned the ages? And what ever became of Miss Elsie?

Then one day it hit me: the most precious Valentine I owned was not bought from an antique store. Oh, I had a far more valuable portrait of love in my possession! It did not look like a typical valentine, heart-shaped and covered with roses or cupids.

My Bible was God's precious, beautiful Valentine to me!

He might have given me a bouquet of flowers, but He knew that the "grass withers, and the flowers fade, but the Word of the Lord endures forever" (Isaiah 40:8).

He might have given me expensive jewelry or fancy chocolates, but the Word of God is more to be desired than gold, and sweeter than honey (Psalm 19:10).

What a Romancer He was! He wooed me through His Word. With eagerness, I began to read His personal expression of love to me. I was astonished to find my name written all over it, in His handwriting! How could He have known all of the intimate details of my heart? My dreams? My plans? My desires? My struggles and pain? I discovered the wonderful answer. He knew me because He had made me!

Unlike antique valentines that spoke of love long ago, I was amazed to discover that His words to me were fresh, real, and relevant. I could never get over the wisdom of His words, for they met me right where I was living. I pondered and meditated upon them, reading His Love Letter over and over again.

God was not content to remain a secret admirer. No, He wanted to reveal Himself to me, so He bared His open heart to my singular soul. I began to learn about Him. About His goodness. His kindness. His gentleness. His compassion. He gave me assurances of His protection. He showered me with grace and mercy. He whispered sweet promises to my heart, and proved faithful to keep every one of them.

Most of all, I learned about His deep, abiding love for me. I had never encountered that kind of love before. A love so great and so deep and so true, that all other human love paled by comparison.

"Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you" (Jeremiah 31:3).

He continued to woo me and didn't stop until I finally gave my heart to Him. Then I wondered why I had waited so long! For He had given me more than His Word, He had given me Himself.

"We love Him because He first loved us." (1 John 4:19).

Though He gave me His love freely, it did not come without cost. Oh, the cost to claim me as His own was beyond measure. For it cost Him His own dear Son. My Valentine is stained red with the shed blood of Jesus.

"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down His life for us." (1 John 3:16).

"Long before he laid down earth's foundations, he had us in mind, had settled on us as the focus of his love, to be made whole and holy by his love. Long, long ago he decided to adopt us into his family through Jesus Christ. (What pleasure he took in planning this!) He wanted us to enter into the celebration of his lavish gift-giving by the hand of his beloved Son" (Ephesians 1:4-6, The Message).

It is not an earthly, paper valentine which will one day turn to dust, but a Heavenly Valentine which cannot be destroyed because its Sender is eternal. His love is permanent, never changing, everlasting. His love endures forever.

And the Romancer has not completed the courtship. He is coming back for His Bride!

"I am my beloved's, and his desire is toward me" (Song of Solomon 7:10).

Will you be His Valentine, too?

© Linda Hayase

(originally published in Apples of Gold, February 2000)

Friday, January 20, 2006

How to Simplify Your Life

~by Elisabeth Elliot

The more complicated life becomes, the more we need to quiet our souls before God. It is my prayer that the following simple (but not by any means easy) principles may be of help to many as they have been, and continue to be, to me. “The Lord God will help me. Therefore shall I not be confounded. Therefore have I set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be ashamed” (Isaiah 50:7, KJV).

1. Go to God first. Kneel in silence. Lift up your heart and hands. Listen. “I am ready; let him do to me whatever seems good to him” (2 Samuel 15:26).

2. Receive the Givens and the Not-Givens. “Lord,cyou have assigned me my portion and my cup, and have made my lot secure” (Psalm 16:5).

3. In acceptance lies peace. “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid” (John 14:27).

4. It is always possible to do the will of God. “If you love me, you will obey what I command” (John 14:15;15:10). “Let the weakest, let the humblest remember, that in his daily course he can if he will, shed around him almost a heaven” (F.W. Robertson).

5. Do it now. “I will hasten and not delay to obey your commands” (Psalm 119:60). “You do not even know what will happen tomorrow” (James 4:14).

6. Love means sacrifice. “This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers” (1John 3:16). Memorize 1 Corinthians 13:1-8.

7. Choose your attitude. “Your attitude should be that of Christ Jesus, who … made himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant.… He humbled himself” (Philippians 2:5, 7, 8).

8. Analyze your struggle. Is it merely delayed obedience? “For some it is ‘Down crosses and up umbrellas!’” but I am persuaded that we must take heaven with the wind and the rain in our faces” (SamuelRutherford). “I run in the path of your commands, for you have set my heart free” (Psalm 119:32).

9. Give it all to Jesus. “Whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it” (Matthew 16:25). “I am willing to receive what You send, to do without what You withhold, to relinquish what You take, to suffer anything You inflict, to do what You command, to be what You ask me to be—at any cost, now and forever” (Anonymous).

10. Do the next thing. “In the evening my wife died.The next morning I did as I had been commanded” (Ezekiel 24:18). “Five minutes of drastic obedience would make things as clear as a sunbeam” (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest).

11. Give thanks always and for everything (Ephesians 5:20). “Let a righteous man strike me—it is a kindness; let him rebuke me—it is oil on my head. My head will not refuse it” (Psalm 141:5).

(originally published in the Elisabeth Elliot newsletter, January 2000).

Two Gifts of Love

Recently, my husband and I celebrated our 10th wedding anniversary. Running out of my own ideas, I asked the Lord what I could give to my husband as an anniversary gift, something that would be unique and meaningful to mark this once-in-a-lifetime occasion.

God does not disappoint; He came through with two gift ideas. I wasn't surprised by His faithfulness, but I was surprised by His answers!

First, He told me to give my husband the gift of prayer. Although it seemed that I was already praying constantly for my husband, the Lord called me to a fresh commitment to pray for my husband daily. Not half-hearted prayers, not selfishly motivated prayers, but earnest and diligent petitions on his behalf. It is the difference between praying and having a prayer life.

"Pray My will for your husband," He urged. "Don't just pray about him, pray for him. Pray that he would be the man I have called him to be. I have revealed it all in My Word. Pray Scripture for him." No other gift that I could give to my husband, the Lord reminded me, would have the kind of lasting value my prayers would have. So I vowed that I would pray for him diligently, every day for the rest of our lives. What a wonderful gift this would be!

The second gift idea also caught me off guard. He urged me to write a love letter to my husband. "A love letter? Did I hear You right, Lord?" "Yes, a love letter."

I had not written a love letter to my husband for a long, long time. I must confess that it had been years. Of course, I did buy him special cards for different occasions, and write little notes. This time, however, I was to sit down with pen and paper and write a love letter? At first, it wasn't as easy as I expected. I felt a bit uncomfortable, somewhat foolish and very vulnerable.

I reflected on where we were some time ago. We've had our shares of struggles over the years, just like every other married couple. We've even had some really tough times, but God gave us the grace to stay together and work through them. Our love had grown and matured because of those dark days in the wilderness. And now, here we were, on the threshhold of a new decade together. What could I write to the one person who, next to God, knew me better than anyone else? And why was it so hard to find the right words?

As I prayed about it, the Lord showed me what had held me back from writing a love letter all these years. Something very ugly: my pride! Pride that made me build a wall around myself so that I wouldn't be hurt. Pride that wouldn't let me be vulnerable. Pride that said, "I'm too busy." Pride that found it very hard to compliment my husband. A wonderful husband, I might add, who I love so very, very much. Yet my pride had kept me from expressing what I needed to say to him.

With a heavy heart, I asked the Lord to forgive me for not loving my husband the way I ought to have. I also asked him for the right words, and prayerfully, I started to write.

I began at the beginning. Our courtship, our engagement, our wedding, honeymoon, and so on. I wrote down every single memory I could think of. The Lord helped me so much in this process. I laughed out loud at the hilarious memories. Painful episodes, though they hurt, brought me back to the cross for healing and forgiveness. Recollecting God's miracles, our children, filled me with thanksgiving and praise. Once I began, a flood of memories came pouring through, and I could barely keep up with my mind and heart.

"My heart is overflowing with a good theme; I recite my composition concerning the King; My tongue is the pen of a ready writer" (Psalm 45:1).

It ended up being a thirteen-page letter! After I was done, I felt a strange mixture of relief, peace and joy. Somehow, the Lord used the very act of writing this letter to remind me of all that He has done, of all that He has given. Here was the very picture of our marriage, of being "heirs together of the grace of life." I fell deeper in love with my husband as God filled me with a new gratitude for him and with a new hope for our future.

Was it worth it? Oh, it was very worth it to see my husband speechless with tears. Things around here haven't been quite the same since then. We've both been changed.

Two simple gifts of love. Prayer. And a love letter.

Oh, Lord, You come up with the best gift ideas!

~Linda Hayase
(originally published in Apples of Gold, February 2000.)

Wednesday, January 18, 2006

The Power of a Praying Wife

So often we pray about our husbands, "Lord, change HIM!" Yet, many times the Lord is calling us to pray, "Lord, change ME!" This is a much tougher prayer to embrace, but one that is necessary for the good of our marriages. It is also one, I believe, that ushers in the blessings of heaven in a mighty way.

May I suggest that you pray this aloud and see how the Lord speaks to your heart?

"Lord, help me to be a good wife. I fully realize that I don't have what it takes to be one without Your help. Take my selfishness, impatience, and irritability and turn them into kindness, long-suffering, and the willingness to bear all things. Take my old emotional habits, mindsets, automatic reactions, rude assumptions, and self-protective stance, and make me patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle and self-controlled. Take the hardness of my heart and break down the walls with Your battering ram of revelation. Give me a new heart and work in me Your love, peace and joy (Galatians 5:22,23). I am not able to rise above who I am at this moment. Only You can transform me.

"Show me where there is sin in my heart, especially with regard to my husband. I confess the times I've been unloving, critical, angry, resentful, disrespectful, or unforgiving toward him. Help me to put aside any hurt, anger, or disappointment I feel and forgive him the way You do--totally and completely, no looking back. Make me a tool of reconciliation, peace, and healing in this marriage. Enable us to communicate well and rescue us from the threshold of separation where the realities of divorce begin.

"Make me my husband's helpmate, companion, champion, friend and support. Help me to create a peaceful, restful, safe place for him to come home to. Teach me how to take care of myself and stay attractive to him. Grow me into a creative and confident woman who is rich in mind, soul and spirit. Make me the kind of woman he can be proud to say is his wife.

"I lay all my expectations at Your cross. I release my husband from the burden of fulfilling me in areas where I should be looking to You. Help me to accept him the way he is and not try to change him. I realize that in some ways he may never change, but at the same time, I release him to change in ways I never thought he could. I leave any changing that needs to be done in Your hands, fully accepting that neither of us is perfect and never will be. Only You, Lord, are perfect and I look to You to perfect us.

"Teach me how to pray for my husband and make my prayers a true language of love. Where love has died, create new love between us. Show me what unconditional love really is and how to communicate it in a way he can clearly perceive. Bring unity between us so that we can be in agreement about everything (Amos 3:3). May the God of patience and comfort grant us to be like-minded toward one another, according to Christ Jesus (Romans 15:5). Make us a team, not pursuing separate, competitive, or independent lives, but working together, overlooking each other's faults and weaknesses for the greater good of the marriage. Help us to pursue the things which make for peace and the things by which one may edify another (Romans 14:19). May we be "perfectly joined together in the same mind and in the same judgment" (1 Corinthians 1:10).

"I pray that our commitment to You and to one another will grow stronger and more passionate every day. Enable him to be the head of the home as You made him to be, and show me how to support and respect him as he rises to that place of leadership. Help me to understand his dreams and see things from his perspective. Reveal to me what he wants and needs and show me potential problems before they arise. Breathe Your life into this marriage.

"Make me a new person, Lord. Give me a fresh perspective, a positive outlook, and a renewed relationship with the man You've given me. Help me to see Him with new eyes, new appreciation, new love, new compassion, and new acceptance. Give my husband a new wife, and let it be me."

~From The Power of a Praying Wife, by Stormie Omartian

Thursday, November 03, 2005

The Wisdom of Susannah Wesley

My friend Phisch posted this on her blog.

Susannah Wesley's Rules on Training Children

(1) Subdue self-will in a child and thus work together with God to save his soul.
(2) Teach him to pray as soon as he can speak.
(3) Give him nothing he cries for and only what is good for him if he asks politely.
(4) To prevent lying, punish no fault that is freely confessed, but never allow a rebellious, sinful act to go unnoticed.
(5) Commend and reward good behavior.
(6) Strictly observe all promises you have made to your child.

Phisch's comments:

I think I need to post these all over our house. She knew a little something about being a good mom. She had 19 children in 21 years (9 died before age 2). She homeschooled all of them for 6 hours a day, writing her own curiculum for bible study. She spent an hour each week with each child to learn about who they are and to guide them in their faith. A lot of work! But Susannah was faithful to the charge God gave her: to train up her children in the way of the Lord. The results are obvious because we still see the effects right. Her son Charles wrote over 9,000 hymns, many still in use today. Her more famous son, John, was the founder of the 18th century Methodist church movement.

Don’t you think the first thing she heard when she went home to be with the Lord was “WELL DONE, good and faithful servant”? That’s what I want to hear, too, but what have I done for Him with what He’s charged me?

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

Twelve Questions

These are good questions to ponder and pray about:

Do you place your hope upon a daily walk with the Lord Jesus Christ, or upon the acceptance of others - specifically pertaining to your theology, dress, mannerisms, speech, political affiliation or social standing?

Does the Word of God speak to you through frequent readings, or do you rely solely on a Sunday morning sermon and/or the writings of our favorite Christian author(s)?

When you come before the Lord, do you enter into your times of prayer with an attitude of humility and contrition seeking those things which will allow you to sacrifice all in order to do all for His glory; or do you come before God and casually praise Him and ask forgiveness of sin with the primary intent of asking Him to solve your money problems or to remove your troubles?

Do you believe that following Christ means only pursing those situations we feel "led" or talented enough to serve, or is such following to make the most of every opportunity and to serve in every possible situation?

Would you honestly be willing to say that you could die this day for your faith in Jesus Christ?

If you were to search your heart, can you fully attest that Jesus Christ is more valuable to you than your children, your possessions, your life's dreams, your occupations and more valuable than any family member or friend?

Would you say that your faith in Christ has progress or do you feel that it has stagnated, regressed or needs no further development?

Are we 21st century Christians, who have the benefit of thousands of years of systematic theology, more effective in the Body of Christ than the 1st century Christians?

Do you still hold bitterness towards anyone you have forgiven in the past?

When you pray, do you pray believing that the Father will answer what you pray?

Is repentance a daily activity for you, or is it engaged less often, rarely or never?

Are there limitations as to whom you will show love?

Thanks to Bob at Mr. Standfast for the link. He says, "These are good questions. Tough questions. Not questions that can be answered blithely, or quickly set aside. They are questions that confront, challenge, and lovingly probe the conscience of every believer. Print them out. Stick them in your Bible. Pick one at a time and let that one question resound in your inner being for a long while. Answer them as if it is Jesus asking, remember that He always blesses the poor in spirit. I believe that you will be blessed by dwelling on these questions."

Amen.

Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Where Strength is Found

Have you ever had one of those months when it seems you are running so hard that your feet did not touch the ground? This past month was such a month for me. Feeling ragged one day, I asked the Lord for a fresh refill of His strength. This is what He said:

"In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and confidence shall be your strength" (Isaiah 30:15).

Quietness, according to the Hebrew, means to be still and to settle down. How I often need to be reminded to do this! My natural inclination is keep going like the Energizer Bunny. But unlike the Bunny, fueled by so-called never-ending batteries, going and going and going on saps my strength. Instead, the Lord says, "Rest. Be quiet. Stay still. Listen to Me. Experience My peace."

Over the years, the Lord has been pruning me of the need to go everywhere. It's still an ongoing battle, but He has given me a desire to center my heart at home and invest in my hidden life with Him. This has been a significant lifestyle change for me as I've always been a woman on the go. God is so gracious to draw us back to Himself when we stray. He says, "Return to Me, and you shall be saved."

Busyness, though, is a condition of the heart and being at home doesn't necessarily mean I am in tune with God. We are told to guard our hearts with all diligence because our hearts are easily distracted. Spending time alone with God and tuning our ears to hear His voice requires a deliberate choice. It doesn't happen automatically. Oh, but what a worthwhile investment, for this is where our Lord faithfully gives us His strength for the tasks at hand!

"In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and confidence shall be your strength" (Isaiah 30:15).

In confidence shall be your strength. Let's look closer at what this really means. The Hebrew definition of confidence is "trust." Where shall I place my trust? Trusting in myself brings spiritual weakness. Trusting in the Lord brings spiritual strength.

A woman who trusts in God is confident in His sovereignty. She is not controlling everything and everyone around her. She is not manipulating situations, nor is she talking too much. She keeps a quiet heart. This is where strength is found.

"Lord, may Your strength be found in me today. Give me quietness and confidence in Your power. In Jesus' name, amen."

~Linda Hayase

(Apples of Gold, November 2001).

Monday, January 10, 2005

God is in Control!

I wrote the following on September 11, 2001, in response to the news of the attacks on the World Trade Center. In light of the recent Asian Tsunami disaster I find myself dwelling on these truths once again:

GOD IS STILL ON THE THRONE!

"I saw the Lord sitting on a throne, high and lifted up, and the train of His robe filled the temple" (Isaiah 6:1).

We may not understand what is going on; we may not understand why these things are happening; we may not know what will happen next; but one thing we can be assured of: GOD IS IN CONTROL! He is not surprised, nor is He wringing His hands wondering what to do. He is
sovereign, and for whatever Kingdom purposes He has in mind, He has allowed this. Let us keep our eyes on the Prince of Peace and remember what He said:

"And there will be signs in the sun, in the moon, and in the stars; and on the earth distress of nations, with perplexity, the sea and the waves roaring; men's hearts failing them from fear and the expectation of those things which are coming on the earth, for the powers of heaven will be shaken. Then they will see the Son of Man coming in a cloud with power and great glory.

"Now when these things begin to happen, look up and lift up your heads, because your redemption draws near" (Matthew 21:25-28).

Look up!

Your redemption draws near!

This is simply another sign that we are living in the last days. May today's events shake us out of our complacency and motivate us to tell others that Jesus Christ is our only hope. May we never take this important truth for granted. This is not the time for panic; this is the time for preaching!

As believers, let us take every thought captive to the obedience of Christ and focus our minds on the truth. He will give us His peace as we rest in His promises.

"You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because He trusts in You" (Isaiah 26:3).

This is a time to ask God to revive our OWN hearts. Let us redeem the time wisely by digging into the Word and bathing our world, our nation and our families in prayer. And let us not forget the sacrifice of praise in all of this.

Let's pray. "Lord, who else can we turn to at a time like this than You? There is none like You, Lord. Only You are worthy to receive all honor and glory and praise. Though we don't understand what is going on, we can rest in the fact that You do. You are in control, Lord, no matter how we feel. You told us to fear not. Lord, help us not to fear. It is difficult at times like this. Help us to keep our minds on Your promises and not on the enemy's lies. Keep us in Your perfect peace.

"Lord, we lift up the families and friends of those who have died. Father, please surround them with your comfort and peace. Draw them to yourself, Lord. Turn their eyes toward You and You alone.

"Lord, we also pray this for our world. Use these events to draw people to You. Open their eyes and help them to see that there is only hope in Christ. Help them to see You as You truly are, not as they perceive You to be. Burden the hearts of believers with a sense of urgency to pray and to share the gospel for Your name's sake!

"We remember your admonition to look up. Our redemption is near! May we redeem the time wisely and live each day as if it is our last. Oh, Lord, how we want You to be glorified through this! In Jesus' name, Amen!"

GOD IS IN CONTROL!

Saturday, December 25, 2004

The Nativity

by C.S. Lewis

Among the oxen (like an ox I'm slow)
I see glory in the stable grow
Which, with an ox's dullness might at length
Give me an ox's strength.

Among the asses (stubborn I as they)
I see my Savior where I looked for hay;
So may my beastlike folly learn at least
The patience of a beast.

Among the sheep (I like a sheep have strayed)
I watch the manger where my Lord is laid;
Oh that my baa-ing nature would win thence
Some woolly innocence!

Thank you to Jared for sharing this C.S. Lewis poem.

Monday, December 13, 2004

Let It Be to Me

Greatly troubled
Am I
At the saying
How can this be
I try to discern
What it means
The explanation
From on High
Is mysterious
Incredible
Unfathomable
Jesus
Son of the Highest
Swirls of thoughts
What shall I do
What shall I say
It is He
The One
I've been waiting
I've been praying
A long time
I have no other choice
But to surrender
Sweet surrender
Come
Prince of Peace
Your will be done
Not mine
Let it be to me
According to Your word

(Inspired by Luke 1:26-38)

© Linda Hayase 2004

Monday, December 06, 2004

Mary and Martha's Christmas

Martha looked around and called, "Mary, where are you? I need you to help me!"

Mary's voice piped up from the other room. "Oh Martha, I'm here…sitting at the feet of Jesus."

Big sigh. Martha shook her head. "Well, we've got work to do. First, we need to decorate the house. Remember those garlands I bought? We've got to untangle the vines so I can put them up."

Mary softly answered. "Let's sit at the feet of Jesus first. He is the True Vine; let's abide in Him. We cannot bear fruit unless we abide in Him."

Martha squinted and looked at the garland carefully. "C'mon, help me out here. I want to hang this garland. Won't it look nice to have it draped over the door when we walk in?"

Mary replied, "Let's sit at the feet of Jesus first. He is the Door. If we enter by Him, we will be saved."

Martha waved her hand distractedly. "Yeah, yeah….but there's so much to be done. We also have to hang the Christmas lights. That takes a lot of time, you know. Have you seen the next door neighbors' tent ? They've gone all out this year. Even their camel is sporting battery-powered lights!"

Mary said, "Let's sit at the feet of Jesus first. He is the Light of the World. If we follow Him, we will not walk in darkness but will have the light of life."

Martha sighed again. "We don't have time for that. There are tons of presents to wrap. And we mustn't forget all the Christmas baking to be done! I've got to get started on the sugar cookies, the fig cookies, the pomegranate cookies, the milk and honey cookies….Oh, and mustn't forget the banana bread! Speaking of which, I'm hungry. We should eat."

The soft voice answered, "Let's sit at the feet of Jesus first. He is the Bread of Life. If we go to Him, we shall never hunger or thirst."

Martha stomped her feet and yelled, "Am I the only one who cares about anything here? I feel like I'm all alone!"

Mary came into the room and gave her a hug. She smiled gently and said, "Dear Sister, you are never alone. Jesus is Immanuel. God With Us."

With a look of concern, she brushed a hair off Martha's wrinkled forehead. "Are you overwhelmed, Sis?" Martha hung her head. When she looked up, she could barely speak. Trembling, she said, "Yes, I am. I am so very tired."

Mary carefully untied Martha's apron strings and hung it up. She rubbed her shoulders and said, "Martha, Jesus came so that we may have life and that more abundantly. You are a hard worker, Sis. But there's a time to work and there's a time to worship. Do you remember that time you got caught up serving when Jesus was here?"

Martha nodded. "Yes, I do. I was so angry! Here I was immersed in preparations for the Lord's arrival, and when I went to get help from you, there you were sitting at the feet of Jesus, hanging on to His every Word. When I demanded that He ask you to help me, I was surprised by His response. He said, `Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her."'

There was silence as she remembered the look of love Jesus had given her.

A slow grin spread over Martha's face. "Mary…I have an idea."

Mary smiled. "Yes?"

Martha said, "Let's sit at the feet of Jesus first."

© Linda Hayase 2004

Sunday, November 28, 2004

Advent Devotionals

1st Sunday of Advent: A Child Will Be Born to Us
Scripture reading: Isaiah 9:2-6

Songs: Away in a Manger; Jesus Loves Me.

Meditation questions:
How much darkness does it take to overcome light?
How much light does it take to overcome darkness?

Monday: The Creator of Man--Genesis 1:26-31
Tuesday: The Fall of Man--Genesis 3:1-24
Wednesday: Promise of Redemption--Genesis 3:15
Thursday: A Prophet Will Come--Deuteronomy 18:15-19
Friday: A Virgin With Child--Isaiah 7:10-14
Saturday: A Righteous Judge--Isaiah 11:1-5

2nd Sunday of Advent: The Birth of Christ
Scripture reading: Matthew 1:18-25

Songs: O Little Town of Bethlehem; O Come, O Come, Emmanuel

Meditation questions:
How did the birth of Jesus Christ change the course of history?
How did the birth of Jesus change your life?

Monday: A Savior and Deliverer--Isaiah 19:19-25
Tuesday: The Sovereign Lord Comes--Isaiah 40:9-11
Wednesday: Behold My Chosen One--Isaiah 42:1-4
Thursday: A Servant Brings Salvation--Isaiah 49:1-7
Friday: A Man of Sorrows--Isaiah 53:1-12
Saturday: God’s Spirit is Upon Him--Isaiah 61:1-3

3rd Sunday of Advent: The Shepherds and the Angels
Scripture Reading: Luke 2:8-20

Songs: Silent Night, Holy Night; O Come, All Ye Faithful

Meditation questions:
What amazes you most about the Christmas story?
How is being amazed different than fear?

Monday: A Righteous Branch--Jeremiah 23:5-6
Tuesday: A Ruler Over Israel--Micah 5:2
Wednesday: Your King is Coming--Zechariah 9:9-10
Thursday: The Messenger is Sent--Malachi 3:1
Friday: The Birth of John is Foretold--Luke 1:1-25
Saturday: The Announcement to Mary--Luke 1:26-38

4th Sunday of Advent: The Visit of the Magi
Scripture Reading: Matthew 2:1-12

Songs: We Three Kings; The First Noel

Meditation questions:
What makes this story of how Herod “missed his King” so tragic?
How do we try to remove Jesus’ authority from our lives today?

Monday: Elizabeth and Mary--Luke 1:39-56
Tuesday: The Birth of Jesus--Luke 2:1-20
Wednesday: Presentation in the Temple--Luke 2:21-38
Thursday: The Pre-Eminent Christ--Colossians 1:15-23
Friday: Worthy Is the Lamb--Revelation 5:1-14
Saturday: The New Heaven and New Earth--Revelation 21:1-7

Christmas Eve: Celebrating the Visit of Christ
Luke 1:67-69

Songs: Joy to the World; Hark! The Herald Angels Sing

Meditation questions:
How do you feel knowing that Christ is looking intensely at His world, His church, and His people?
What do you think about when you consider the Second Coming of Jesus?

~Compliments of Discipleship Journal. Material taken from the book, Christ in Christmas.

Friday, November 26, 2004

Submitting When Your Convictions Differ

Introduction: "The woman who hopes, by submission to somehow gain an easy existence will be sadly surprised some day. We do not submit in order to bring our husbands to Christ, but rather to obey one of the very few direct commands that the Word addresses specifically to women. Jesus Christ makes so few commands of us, yet we do such a pitiful job of obeying the One whom we claim is our Lord. True love and peace come from God, when He chooses to bless us with His Holy Spirit. We can have true peace, not when our husbands finally see the light, but when we finally see the light. To be finally happy is a poor reason to submit. To get our marital way is a poor reason to pray." ~ Victoria Porter.

Submitting When Your Convictions Differ
by Cathy White

A woman receives a teaching and the conviction becomes part of her heart. Her husband does not receive it, does not agree with it and may not even fully understand it. (It is probably true that she tries to make him understand.) Then she is at a critical juncture... shall she actively attempt to live out her conviction or shall she submit to her husband? The answer of course, is to submit and lay her doctrinal issue at the feet of Jesus..."

This is what I wrote in the last issue of An Encouraging Word in Sharing the Vision. A sister called and asked me, "But how? How do you do that? How do you lay your doctrinal issue at the feet of Jesus?" And that is how this article came to be. I want to share with you the things I have learned about laying down at the feet of Jesus convictions that have been between Nick and I.

When I became pregnant with Lauren I made a dramatic and sudden commitment to the Lord. If it is possible to be overcommited and overzealous for Jesus, I was. Nick did not make a cut and dried decision as I did. His commitment came gradually. Over the years we have reached a happy medium, but for a while it seemed as if there were a chasm separating our convictions. Often they were directly opposed.

When Lauren was an infant, I embarked upon the journey of becoming the perfect parent. I read scriptural child-training books by the dozen. I am an exceptionally fast reader and I just soaked in all of that information. At the same time I was eager to discover how to be a perfect wife. My plan was to figure out how to do it, then just be that perfect wife! The teaching of submission came up right at the
beginning of this quest and all of my new learning came to a halt...I just could not live it. Not only could I not live it, I didn't even understand it! I went to the Lord with "what if's" for every situation. "What if he... does this or that. What if he... says this or that. What if he doesn't do the right thing?"

Looking back I see that I was so intent on creating the perfect world for my child to live in that I would not submit. I did not trust God to provide a nuturing, godly atmosphere for her. I was very much afraid of the ungodly influence Nick would have in our home and I insisted upon controlling his influence and therefore our home. I was afraid that Nick would interfere and stop God's plan for my life and I wouldn't get to live that plan. (I still battle this thought at times!)

Upon sharing my fear with an older and much wiser woman she replied by way of a letter: "Your husband is a person. So few women see this. Husbands are real human beings, formed in the image of God, just as women are. Why do women worry that the husband will ruin the children? Why do they refuse to see that any person, even a female one, could ruin a child by disobeying God? We often think our disobedience is somehow better, more excusable or more forgivable than his. We think his football watching will open the door to Satan more than our rebellion or rejecting will. A home with a slouchy man and a humble, God-serving woman as parents will turn out Godly kids, according to the Bible. (The reverse is also true, but women can see that.)

Wives fall short of the glory of God. We excuse our shortcomings as mothers under the guise of being human, but we never think such lenient thoughts about our husbands and their responsibilities to God and the children. We are supposed to love them as we love ourselves, understanding because we make the same boo-boos. We forgive because we desire to see God's forgiveness. We intercede, not because we would like to see a few changes, nor because we definitely know we are right, but because God's grace working in the husband's life would make him more joyous and it blesses us to see him experience the goodness of God."

The Lord was merciful to me. He gave me a desire to submit and peace in submission. Gradually, one day at a time, issue by issue, He has begun to show me what submission is. The Holy Spirit continually ministers to me by encouraging me in submission. Back then, I laid my perceptions of what I thought God wanted my life to be like at the feet of Jesus by submitting to my husband and trusting God to work those perceptions into reality. Some He has, some He hasn't. I turned by back on my idea of how a Christian life should be lived. At the time I did not realize that I would be turning my back on my perceptions for the rest of my life!

I took comfort in Philippians 1:6, "...He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Jesus Christ." I began to trust in the Lord to make my life what He wanted it to be. Proverbs 21:1 was also a comfort to me, "The king's heart is in the hand of the Lord; he directs it like a watercourse wherever he pleases." I take this to mean that my husband's heart is in God's hands and God will direct it. My husband is the authority in my life; the king in my life. God is over my husband.

It took me a few years to adjust to and accept the fact that it was not my responsibility to incorporate convictions into our lifestyle. It was God's! The Biblical chain of command is God, man, woman. 1 Corinthians 11:3, "Now I want you to realize that the head of every man is Christ and the head of the woman is man and the head of Christ is God." God directs the husband. The husband directs the wife. There are no exclusions. The head of every man is Christ, regardless of the state of the man's soul. Whether or not man accepts the reality of Christ's position is irrelevant.

A wife can step out of the chain of command and force her way. This is done often, everywhere. A wife can seize her husband's position, just as Lucifer tried to seize God's position. If she is successful in her power grab, she becomes a usurper of his position. She is ruling, but wrongfully. If your eye is clear, you can see it in the church, in the home, in the workplace, in the world.

On the surface of the family, there can appear to be good fruit in the children as a result of the wife taking control, but in the long run the fruit is bad. The children learn rebellion to all authority. They never have a chance to see God's hand move, but instead always the wife moving. The children learn to take matters into their own hands rather than waiting on God to move, as their mother has taught them by her actions.

The breaking point came in my life over one particular conviction. I remember this day clearly. My grief over the state of my husband and my family had increased for months and I was distraught over the situation. I came to the realization that day that I was going to have to either submit to my husband and let my conviction go (I thought Nick's heart would never be changed regarding it) or keep the conviction and in so doing destroy my marriage. Yes, this conviction and my insistence upon living it was literally destroying my marriage. Nick and I were both miserable. To make matters worse, I was convinced that the conviction I had was from the Lord and was a direction for my family. I was faced with choosing one sin (not living the conviction) over another sin (not submitting).

I made a decision to let the conviction go, not out of any spiritual maturity, but because the consequences of a tattered marriage seemed worse than the consequences of ungodly influences in my children's lives. I chose submission and my marriage, though I longed to live my perception of the perfect Christian family. I gave up my plans, which I was convinced were the same as God's plans, over to the Lord and told him, "You came up with this idea! You gave me a vision for my family! If this is what you want, you are going to have to deal with my husband."

This is the start of laying your convictions at the feet of Jesus. You must acknowledge where you are spiritually. Then walk away from your plans, your wants, your ideas, your convictions, your desires. Give them up! Be at peace with where you are today. Be satisified with what your husband has ordained for your life today.

You can't make your husband change. Even if your conviction is from God, you can't cause him to have a heart understanding of it. You can't give him a zeal for living it. Those things belong to the working of the God and to him alone. You are not in control of your husband's heart and you never will be. He may try to live your convictions or allow you to live them, but you will still not be pleased. He will be a hypocrite, saying and doing one thing but believing another.

There is a definite difference between your husband performing for your approval and your husband living his convictions. There is a difference between your husband allowing you to act independently because he doesn't want to stifle you or fight with you and him leading your family. It is far better to have husband leading you, even if he isn't leading in your direction than to not have him leading at all!

The deep satisfaction and trust a wife longs to put in her husband comes only when he is truly leading, even if he is not 100% on what you think is the right track. A man is not a man unless he is fulfilling his God-given role, and that is one of forging ahead of his family, making the way for them to follow. It is not your responsibility to make him forge ahead on a determined path. It is God's. It is your responsibility to submit to your husband, to respect him, to admire him. Do your part. Quit trying to do God's.

Do you wonder, then, why it seems that a woman's heart so easily accepts new convictions? It would appear to be more seemly to have a man's heart be the one that easily accepts the new. Then he could cajole his wife into following and she would never be tempted to invert the chain of command. God did not design a woman this way, however. She does receive more easily. A woman can cut her griefs by three-quarters if she learns to test what she is receiving. Is it from God or not? Please do not misunderstand me, here. A subtle distinction must be made. The question is not, "Is the conviction Godly?" The question is, "Is the conviction from God?"

Godly convictions include: being in the ministry full-time, giving away your wordly goods, playing the piano full-time for church services, homeschooling, etc. (I have intentionally left out those convictions that are hot-button issues. You fill in the blank, if you think it applies!) These are all good things. They can be supported scripturally, but they are not commands. They are not heaven and hell issues. They are side issues. Is there one you are wondering about? Are you feeling led to change your lifestyle in order to honor a conviction? Is it really God? Only you and your husband can answer that, but I assure you, sisters, if your husband is not in agreement with the conviction, then it is not for your family, no matter how Godly it is. I encourage you to test this for yourself by testing the fruit of each side of the issue. Let's say that the wife receives a conviction but the husband does not. She believes it is from God, it is for her family right now and she persists in trying to make it a part of their lifestyle. He just does not see it. What is the fruit? She will be unhappy and unfulfilled. She will focus on what "should" be rather than what is. She will experience feelings of condemnation, guilt, shame, unrighteousness and unholiness. She will feel trapped between her husband and God.

Most importantly, she is in rebellion to her authority. Our obedience to our husbands is to be as unto the Lord. We are a picture of the church. What kind of church looks at Jesus and says, "Well, Jesus, someday you will figure out that I was right and then we can get this ball rolling!"? It sounds like Lucifer because it is. Do you see the awful rebellion in this? Rebellion is not an action. It is a heart issue. We often recognize it, though, by actions resulting from the heart attitude. The subtle, silent pining, waiting, hoping for God finally straighten out a husband is rebellion, too, although there is no open action in this. Are you praying and praying for patience to wait for your slow God to speed up your slow man? In truth, God is waiting on you!

Let's say that the wife sees a conviction as being Godly, but since her husband does not agree she determines that it is not for her family right now and she sets it before the Lord. She hopes that at a later time God will work it into her family through her husband, but her hope does not carry her through each day. Her focus is not on tomorrow and what she hopes her family will be like. She is joyful and excited about today, knowing that God is in control. She is patient, knowing God will work that conviction into her life if it is His will. She is able to be faithful in her daily chores right now and to prepare for whatever God has for her. She is free to be loving and kind to her husband because she is not struggling against him. If her husband is saved, she can be in unity with him. If he is not
saved, she can at least be at peace in her situation. She has the fruit of the spirit! Check it out against the list in Galatians 5:22-23.

In considering whether or not a conviction is from God, do not forget that in the garden it was woman who was deceived, not man. Women, especially Christian women, do not see heart motives as easily as men. We trust. We are deceived. Do not believe that every teacher that comes down the pike has your best interests at heart. We need to remember that Eve "heard something." We look at our apple and see, of course, that it is lovely. We are deceived into thinking that our wisdom is superior. We think we know as much as God, but our husbands do not have a clue! Husbands hear from God, too, sisters. A husband has things to minister to the wife, but often she is too busy "hearing things" and then pining over "what ought to have been."

Then there is the one-quarter of the time that the wife is right and the husband is wrong. The conviction is from God. It is for your family right now. But your husband doesn't realize it! Husbands are wrong sometimes, too. They make mistakes. Here is where you must give your husband mercy and allowance to be wrong. Ecclesiastes 7:20 says, "There is not a righteous man on earth who does what is right and never sins." This means to me that my righteous and Godly man makes mistakes! He sins. I must submit to an authority who is not always going to make the right decision, not always going to understand, not always going to see God's way. Forgive your husband and get on with enjoying your life with him! Trust God to show him the right way. Pray for him.

Consider, too, that the Lord may be showing you a direction so that you can be an intercessor for your family. He may be showing you a direction in order to prepare you emotionally and mentally for the change that is coming. But that's it! God does not intend to work from the bottom up. He never has. He never will. Furthermore, he is God. He is fully capable of rearranging your family's lifestyle without your input. Yes, God has taken situations that started from the bottom up and worked them out. He will continue to do so because he is a merciful God. But this is not his plan and intent.

Notice that the two reasons above do not require a wife to tell her husband of the conviction, let alone direct him regarding it. I am learning to keep quiet, in prayer and preparation, so that when God reveals whatever it is to Nick we can confirm for each other how Godis moving. We can then enter into whatever God has for us together, in readiness and unity.

One particular incident comes to my mind as I am writing this. We were making a decision about choosing a man to hire to do some work. It was work that was of importance to us and we were anxious to have it done properly. The Lord spoke to me about hiring a certain man, but I did not tell Nick. I only prayed that Nick would be given wisdom to choose the right person. Several weeks later Nick said, "Honey, I know who we are supposed to hire to do this work...I hope you are going to be okay with it." Then he revealed the name of the same man that God spoke to me. God spoke to both of us, separately, and we were able to confirm His voice to each other. We hired the man to do the work. Whenever problems arose and we became concerned about different aspects of the job, we were able to use our agreement and our knowledge that God had clearly spoken to stop each other from being critical, anxious and negative about the project. It was a time in our marriage of learning to function as one in what God wanted us to do.

This does not mean, however, that wives get to be preinformed on every issue. We don't and we won't. Sometimes God speaks to wives, sometimes not. Whether He does or not, we are to submit and support our husbands, keeping unity in our marriages. Notice, also, that the two reasons I've given require a wife to act upon revelation knowledge with considerable self-control. If God lets you in on a secret, can you keep it?

Your husband is your covering. Do not slip out from under your covering because you think you know better than him. In truth, he may love you so much that he will agree with your deception in order to keep from being separated from you. Isn't this what Adam did in the garden? Do not be mistrustful of God and forget that He has caused your husband to be the covering. If your man is doing something wrong, be at peace in submission, knowing that God will honor your recognition of divine order.

We have a choice, sisters. God made us with a free will. We can submit to divine order and put our whole hearts in God's hands by submitting to the authority placed over us or we can insist on controlling our families and our homes. I find that it is a daily choice, a faith walk, an adventure with Jesus.

This article was reprinted with permission from Wisdom's Gate. It first appeared in An Encouraging Word, a quarterly magazine which challenges and equips women of all ages to find their fulfillment in serving God in the context of the home. Subscriptions: $16/yr. Write to Wisdom's Gate, P.O. Box 374, Covert, MI 49043. Website: An Encouraging Word

How to Cause Your Husband to Unequivocally Reject Your Convictions

1) Hold the teacher of that conviction in higher esteem than you hold him. If you have a discussion about that conviction, insist that so-and-so is right and he is wrong.

2) Believe in your heart that he really does not know what is best for your family.

3) Believe in your heart that he really is not capable of hearing from God. Or, if he is capable of hearing from God, he doesn't hear as clearly as you.

4) Believe in your heart that you really are the more spiritual of the two of you.

5) Be critical of any of his attempts to understand or live your convictions.

6) Nag him about the conviction constantly. Don't ever let him forget that you have a problem with the way he believes.

7) Threaten to leave him and take his children with you if he doesn't straighten up.

8) Stay mad at him and don't ever do little things to make him feel loved, appreciated or special.

9) Remind him of the times he has made decisions that were wrong.

10) Argue and disagree verbally in front of the children.

11) Express nonverbally with body language your disagreement. Do this in front of the children. (Shrug your shoulders, smirk, roll your eyes.)

12) Turn his weaknesses into family jokes. For example, "You know Dad can't read a map... ha, ha, ha."

13) Challenge or correct him publicly.

14) Ignore his direction or pretend you didn't hear. Or, just don't ask at all.

15) Call him names or communicate sarcastically and hatefully.

(Yes, we confess. Wenda has done some of these and I've done all of them. BUT we've repented; confessed and turned the other way.)

~ by Cathy White and Wenda Blankenship. Reprinted with permission from Wisdom's Gate. This article first appeared in An Encouraging Word, a quarterly magazine which challenges and equips women of all ages to find their fulfillment in serving God in the context of the home. Subscriptions: $16/yr. Write to Wisdom's Gate, P.O. Box 374, Covert, MI 49043. Website: An Encouraging Word

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

Simplifying Christmas, part 1

Christmas used to be a big source of stress for us--a long list of people with whom we exchanged gifts, a growing disdain of crowded malls, marathon baking sessions, wrapping gifts past midnight, fighting traffic and the pressure of a December 25th deadline. Who had time for things of the Lord? All things conspired to borne out the saying: No Jesus, No Peace. Know Jesus, Know Peace.

Every year we'd talk about our deep yearning for a simple Christmas. You know, the kind you read about in old books where the holidays are focused on seeking opportunities to serve others and being a witness to God's faithfulness and provision. Instead of the frantic, mad rush to buy, wrap and deliver gifts, we would gather the family together for good food, lots of laughter and singing, and the recounting of God's goodness during the past year. Most of all, we would give thanks for the gift of His precious Son, our Lord Jesus.

In the immediate aftermath of September 11th, all these desires came rushing back to us as we contemplated the tragedy and everything we held dear to our hearts--family, friends and faith in God. In late October, we decided to send out what we thought was a radical Christmas letter.

Dear Friends,

It's hard to believe, but Christmas is right around the corner!

Though we have enjoyed exchanging gifts in the past, we would like to propose an alternative. In lieu of exchanging Christmas gifts with our family each year, our heart's desire is that the money would be given instead to a favorite ministry or charity; to a child or family in need; or to the families of the victims of the terrorist attacks.

It's not that we don't appreciate the gifts; and it's not that we don't want our children to have anything special. It's just that with each passing year, we realize just how blessed our family is.
There are many others in the world, however, who are struggling and could use a helping hand.

We believe this is in keeping with the Christmas spirit, for the essence of the Christmas story is that Jesus came to give of Himself. We want our children to appreciate what God has given to us through Christ and to consider what we may offer Him, rather than focusing on a mountain of gifts under the tree.

Thank you for your generous and thoughtful gifts to us in the past. Our family is truly blessed, and your friendship is among the most precious gifts we could ever receive!

God bless you,

(Signed by our family)

We braced ourselves for backlash, but it never came. Instead, the responses were of agreement, encouragement and relief. Not only did it give us a tremendous sense of freedom from the tyranny of the urgent, we were also incredibly blessed to witness other families follow the same path and downscale gift-giving while increasing acts of charity.

Although we do exchange gifts with our immediate family (after all, a grandparent's prerogative is to buy gifts for their grandchildren) and remember all the service workers (Sunday school teachers, newspaper delivery guy, mail carrier, etc.), the holidays for us no longer revolves around "The Christmas Rush" but around the Prince of Peace instead. Our Christmas season has indeed become a time of peaceful celebration when we can delight in the joy of the Lord and His marvelous gifts.

Simplifying Christmas, part 2

After I shared our plans for simplifying Christmas, I received a wonderful letter from a sweet Sister in Christ. She agreed to let me share it with you:

Dear Linda,

Concerning your new plans for Christmas, I would like to share that I was at the same spot 13 years ago. Our oldest daughter was only three then and the only grandchild at the time. We had the traditional Christmas with mountains of presents that our daughter Halley was tearing through with out hardly a glance at any of them. I had just finished the book, "In His Steps" by Charles Sheldon. It was from this book that the "What Would Jesus Do?.....WWJD" came from. As I watched from a short distance away from all the bustling of opening gifts...I kept hearing the words, "What would Jesus do" echoing in my head. What would Jesus do with Christmas?

I was convicted to the very core of my being and later on that night when everyone had gone home, Halley was in bed and the house was quiet, I talked to my husband Michael about what was on my heart concerning Christmas and posed the question to him, "What would Jesus have us do with Christmas?" To make a long story short, we totally revamped our Christmas for the following year. Santa was nixed much to the despair of my mother-in-law. Most of our decorations were sold at a yard sale the following summer leaving only our very favorites (and making much needed room in our attic) and we requested that our parents give Halley only three gifts and one of them would be something from each grandmother that had some family significance, such as a doll of theirs, a book, a pendant, a journal. We scaled WAY BACK on what we gave to each other.

We got together on Christmas Eve the following year with all our family and had dinner together. Actually it was like a birthday party....for Jesus. We had balloons, and the table was a combination between Christmas reds and greens and a birthday theme. We had a birthday cake that said Happy Birthday Jesus on it and we sang Happy Birthday to Him...(we all blew out the candles on the cake...no, there weren't 1,989 candles). We went around the table and gave testimonies of why we were so thankful to have Jesus in our lives.

After dinner we went to church and then came home and opened the few gifts we had for each other and took our time in opening them and savoring each. Come Christmas morning we got up early to get to our community recreation center and set up to feed anyone who didn't have a place to eat or go on this day. This was what we had decided Jesus would have us do with our Christmas.

We sent letters out to the churches in our town and asked them to financially help us provide a free Turkey dinner for those who were without. 125 people came that first year. That was 12 years ago and we have held onto this new tradition of feeding those in our community on Christmas Day who have no one or nowhere to go ever since. We now hold the dinner in the largest church in our town and we serve anywhere from 400-500 meals.

We still have our Christmas Eve birthday party-gift giving time with family. My mother-in-law got over leaving Santa out and Jesus in. Our two daughters, Halley and Jayne, don't know any other way of celebrating Christmas, and look forward to the dinner every year. Many of their friends and family come to help and volunteer and the dinner is just a big party with entertainment, gifts and a free turkey buffet meal. We keep it very festive and lively which helps to cheer up those attending. Both our mothers who are widowed and live nearby work along side us with all the preparations. Some who are alone or needy, have been with us every year. It's not long now and we will be cooking and gathering supplies for our 12th year in serving dinner to our "neighbors" in Ocean City and the surrounding area.

So I say, "Go for it." Bring on a new tradition, keeping the spirit of Christ in Christmas and doing what Jesus would have you do in His Name. For we are extensions of His Heart and Hands here on Earth. Simplify away....cut back on Christmas clutter and stress, and I guarantee you will find yourself with the most wonderful memories and sense of peace and joy ever felt on this most blessed day. Though it be a tad early...Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Your Sister in Christ,
Peaches

Tuesday, November 16, 2004

Keeping Christ in Christmas

Because Jesus can become God's only forgotten Son, instead of God's only begotten Son, here are seven tips on how not to lose sight of Jesus this Christmas.

1. Read the Word.

Nothing will remind you of the Christmas story like the Christmas story itself.

2. Remember to pray!

Pray for godly priorities, for unsaved family members, and for those in need.

3. Don't replace worship with holiday work.

Don't get so busy in rushing from Christmas play, to Christmas service, to Christmas party that you forget to worship God. Don't lose sight of your first love: Jesus Christ.

4. Meet with God's people.

Make time for you and your family to go to church. Jesus manifests His presence in a unique and special way when His people gather together in His name.

5. Be about your Father's business.

Be sure that what you're celebrating is of the Lord. Make sure that you're not getting caught up in the world's view of Christmas rather than the Word's view of Christmas.

6. Remember Who the celebration is for.

As you decorate, shop and plan, remember that Jesus Christ is the reason for it all.

7. Repent and repeat.

If you find yourself losing sight of Jesus this Christmas, simply repent—change your direction. Then repeat. Go back to that place where you lost Him. Chances are you need to get back into prayer, the Word, fellowship, and sharing the gospel with the unsaved.

~ by Greg Laurie, pastor of Harvest Christian Fellowship and evangelist of the Harvest Crusades. http://www.harvest.org

Sunday, November 14, 2004

Your Worth to God

"If, thinking of your frailty, you hold yourselves cheap, value yourselves by the price that was paid for you."

~ St. Augustine

Saturday, November 13, 2004

A Prayer for the Overwhelmed

Have you ever been in one of those seasons of life when the load seemed too heavy to bear? During such a time in my life, I grappled to find the right words to pray but it seemed as though the air had evaporated them all. God is gracious. As I read His Word, the Holy Spirit gave me these words to pray:

"Hear my prayer, O Lord;
Listen to my plea!
Answer me because You are faithful and righteous.
I cry out to You,
I plead for Your mercy.
I pour out my complaints before You,
And tell You all my troubles.
For I am overwhelmed,
And You alone know the way I should turn.
Show me where to walk,
For I have come to You in prayer.
When I pray You answer me,
You encourage me by giving me the strength I need.
I will praise You, my God and King,
and bless Your name forever and forever."

Inspired by Psalm 143:1, 142:1-3, 143:8b, 138:3, 145:1 (NLT).

Monday, November 08, 2004

It's Between You and God

People are often unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered;
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives;
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful you will win some false friends and true enemies;
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you;
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building, someone could destroy overnight;
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous;
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will often forget tomorrow;
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have, and it may never be enough;
Give the world the best you've got anyway.

You see, in the final analysis, it is between you and God;
It was never between you and them anyway.

~Mother Teresa

A Woman of the Word

A Woman of the Word is different than a woman of the world.

She is careful whom she listens to. She does not put her faith in the opinions of Abby, Oprah or Martha. When she has concerns, her first thought is not to go to a web board, or call a friend or visit a therapist. Instead, God's opinions matter the most to her. She has the TV off and her Bible open. She turns to the Lord first in all things. She knows that only He has perfect wisdom, and she is eager to hear what He has to say. When He speaks, she listens. She ponders every word with her whole heart. She asks questions, knowing that He will hear and answer her, for He loves her. She can't stop thinking about Him from the moment she wakes up to the moment she falls asleep.

Everything around her reveals a personal message to her from Him. God delights to bless and prosper this daughter of His. He helps her with whatever task she undertakes, and pours out His supernatural power into her life. He leads and guides her every move. She lacks no good thing because He gives her the desires of her heart.

Her life reflects this love relationship. She is hopeful when others are anxious. She is strong when others are weak. She is refreshed when others are weary. She is peaceful when others are frustrated. She is wise when others are foolish. She praises God when others are complaining. She is one of the most productive and generous women around; but ironically, she is not stressed. Her life is abundant and joyful.

People watch her and wonder: How does she do it? What's her secret? Why is she different? When they ask her, she is ready to give an answer for the hope that lies within her. She points them to the Lord. She praises Him. She magnifies Him. She gives God all the glory, for she knows without Him she could do nothing.

Her life is a lush garden, full of beauty and splendor in every season. Whether it is in the hope of spring, the heat of summer trials, the shedding of fall clutter or the lonely pruning of the chilly winter, her life is constantly in bloom with God's grace and mercy. She tends to her garden with much care and maintains it with thoughtful order. It is colorful and a pleasure to all who gaze at it, and passerby long to stay there for spiritual refreshment. She sows seeds of encouragement, seeds of comfort, seeds of compassion and seeds of faith. She waters everything with prayer. Then she steps back and lets God take over as her Master Gardener. He gives the increase, and her garden bears much fruit. And He is well pleased.

Inspired by Psalm 1:1-3, Isaiah 58:11, Jeremiah 17:7-8 and Proverbs 31:10-31.

© Linda Hayase

Sunday, November 07, 2004

Surrender

"If we will let Him, God will fill in the details of our lives, written in the indelible ink of His covenant faithfulness and love."

~Nancy Leigh DeMoss, from Surrender: The Heart God Controls.

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Sacred Marriage

We're after what a great Christian writer, Francis de Sales, wrote about in the seventeenth century. Because de Sales was a gifted spiritual director, people often corresponded with him about their spiritual concerns. One woman wrote in great distress, torn because she very much wanted to get married while a friend was encouraging her to remain single, insisting that it would be "more holy" for her to care for her father, and then devote herself as a celibate to God after her father died.

De Sales put the troubled young woman at ease, telling her that, far from being a compromise, in one sense, marriage might be the toughest ministry she could ever undertake. "The state of marriage is one that requires more virtue and constancy than any other," he wrote. " It is a perpetual exercise of mortification. . . . From this thyme plant, in spite of the bitter nature of its juice, you may be able to draw and make the honey of a holy life."

Notice that de Sales talks about the occasionally "bitter nature" of marriage's "juice." To spiritually benefit from marriage, we have to be honest. We have to look at our disappointments, own up to our ugly attitudes, and confront our selfishness. We also have to rid ourselves of the notion that the difficulties of marriage can be overcome if we simply pray harder or learn a few simple principles. Most of us have discovered that these "simple steps" work only on a superficial level. Why is this? Because there's a deeper question that needs to be addressed beyond how we can "improve" our marriage: What if God didn't design marriage to be "easier"? What if God had an end in mind that went beyond our happiness, our comfort, and our desire to be infatuated and happy as if the world were a perfect place?

What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy? What if, as de Sales hints, we are to accept the "bitter juice" because out of it we may learn to draw the resources we need with which to make "the honey of a holy life"?

~ Gary Thomas, in "Sacred Marriage."